This week’s topic is Top Ten Literary Turn offs. As a disclaimer this will be a fairly cranky post listing all my pet peeves. I already hear the Beetles at my window yelling “Hey Mister? Can we have our ball back?”
1. Twighlit I am so sick of everything that has to do with this series of books. I hate the characters; I hate the story line and anything that is related to those books. If a book says that it is a fan fiction of twighlit or is just like twighlit I’m out. I know it’s the ultimate crumudgen point but there are so many other really good vampire/werewolf stories out there and Bella just really really really gets on my nerves.
2. Domineering Male Characters Male characters written so strongly that they not only overshadow the female characters but they try to push the strong ones around. There is a distinct difference between the two alpha personalities going at it versus the one major alpha personality just trying to run the show.
3. 16 year olds with mid life crises I am sorry but when you are 16 you don’t have to have it figured out. You don’t always find the love of your life. I can’t stand these YA books that have these teenagers that are struggling to figure everything out. The end result: I feel old and like I looser, I didn’t have my life figured out until I was in my 20’s.
4. Strong Main Stream Religious Themes. I am not an organized religion kind of girl and books with these themes for me are just a turn off.
5. Military. Live with a soldier. Have a bunch of military stuff around the house. Spent 3 years living by a base. Have absolutely no desire at all whatsoever to read anything fiction or non fiction that has to do with the military.
6. Legal Thrillers In my day job I am a paralegal. From 9-5 I eat, breathe and sleep law. I am also a board member of the Orange County Paralegal Association. Though I love being a paralegal and a board member, when I tuck into a book I want to escape. I don’t want to be reminded of work or a board meeting or something that I need to do.
7. Weak Willed Women these characters are just so hard for me to get behind. How can you root for someone who is supposed to be your heroine when they can’t even make up their mind.
8. Erroneous Facts on Real Events. When writing a piece of historic fiction there is a certain amount of literary license an author gets when writing the story. Ok you smudge a relationship or two. You fill in some blanks in an age old mystery but as the Doctor says: YOU CAN’T CHANGE A FIXED POINT IN TIME. Get the big stuff right. Take the time to study your history. There are certain things you cannot fudge or change. Dates, people, certain cultures interacting before their time(Dan Brown, I’m looking at you).
9. Dues Ex Machina or Force Measure Endings. These are the endings where your characters are in a horrible situation and then all of a sudden the hand of God (or the writer in this case) causes an earthquake, hurricane, a certain horcrux placed in just front of the main character at just the right time….yeah total turn off.
10. Too Many Parallel Story Lines When done properly this can be a really effective style. However, when you have too many differing voices or points of view as a reader I just get lost and frustrated.
So hopefully I didn’t sound too cranky. If you want to play along just post a link to the Broke and the bookish on your blog and then one on to theirs.